#GucciTheRitual, Gucci // 📸 Polaroid i-Type Film, 2021

I had the chance to catch up with queer author, columnist, and provocateur Dan Savage this week for QBlog in advance of his new book “American Savage”, which comes out on Tuesday! We chatted about sex, marriage equality, community pushback, transphobia, biphobia, bullying, the new book and more.

Read my interview with Dan below, then come out to Powell’s books this Sunday at 2pm for a Q Center-sponsored reading, Q&A, and meet and greet with Mr. Savage himself!

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Logan Lynn: Hey Dan. Thanks for squeezing me into your busy schedule today. I’m looking forward to your book launch event at Powell’s in Portland coming up this weekend on June 2nd! How does it feel to be making these book rounds once again?

Dan Savage: (Laughs) It feels good. It’s been 7 years since I managed to carve out the time to sit down and write a book because they invented blogging and podcasting and vlogging and Twitter and Instagram. It’s not enough anymore to write a weekly column or bust out a few news items a week. You have to be constantly running your mouth online. It really takes the time away that I used to be able to put into plowing away at a book. It was a tough thing to manage.

Lynn: Well, I’m looking forward to reading it. You recently won an Emmy as well, correct?

Savage: Yeah. I didn’t win an Emmy, everybody who participated in the It Gets Better project won an Emmy. It was awarded The Governor’s Award, which is kind-of their Up With People, social justice, good works award. We are really proud to have gotten (the Emmy) but it was for the project and it’s because of the great impact it has had. The Emmy wasn’t for me and Terry. It was for all of us.

Lynn: That’s really great. What has been the most rewarding part of being involved with the It Gets Better project for you?

Savage: I’ve heard from so many LGBT kids who were helped by the project. People don’t write newspaper stories about kids who don’t kill themselves, so most of these stories aren’t out there and people don’t hear them. I now have ongoing penpal/Twitterpal relationships with some of the Read the rest of this entry »

Note: My monthly column for Just Out Magazine “In The Trenches” was published today in the October issue. The piece is called “The Curse of Being Old Fashioned” and is about accepting all types of relationships. Unfortunately, the last 2 (very important) paragraphs were accidentally left out of the print version (something that has been making me CRAZY for days, and I’m sure will continue to all month) but the online version is complete. You can check out the original by clicking the cover image below, or just keep reading below.

In The Trenches: “The Curse of Being Old-Fashioned”

Let me start by saying I believe everyone should have the right to love whoever they please, however they please. My choice to love monogamously, and my sharing my thoughts around said loving with you all, is not meant to diminish your thoughts and choices, but rather to offer up yet another queer voice on the matter. I am not making a case for monogamy with this article, but rather a case for acceptance.

In recent days I’ve been reading a lot of articles about love, commitment, and the “M” word, followed by discussions with my fellow queers about said articles, and it’s left me feeling frustrated. I can’t help but wonder, at what point in our queer cultural development did it become acceptable to imply (or say outright) that a person or couple who chooses to be in a monogamous relationship is somehow less evolved than those who do not? I have encountered this view before in my previous dating misadventures, friendships, and relationships … as though my wanting to be with only one man for the rest of my life is buying into a “heteronormative” idea about love and, in so doing, is somehow oppressing you in yours.

It has been my experience that being what some would consider “old fashioned” feels, at times, a bit like a curse for an out, gay man. I have never had anonymous sex. I have never hooked up with anyone off of Craigslist. I have an iPhone but I am not on Grindr or Scruff or Manhunt or whatever other sites people use these days to populate their casual sex lives. In fact, I have never had a very casual sex life. It has always been tied to relationship or a longing for deep connection. My being this way has made it difficult for me to relate to the experience of many of my queer peers, and almost impossible for them to relate to me.

I don’t believe being monogamously in love is the Read the rest of this entry »