Well it has been really amazing getting to work with The Gentry this past year. I’ve been able to realize some loud rock dreams with those guys in tow and I’m really grateful for the time they spent working to prepare for our tour together this Summer and all the time spent traveling around the U.S. with me in a van. We had some really magical moments on and off stage. I was finally able to move past some fairly long-standing stage fright and found freedom in the band format, having just been a singing DJ up to that point. I have Gino, Steve & AC to thanks for that.
We have had our share of disasters along the way as well…much of which revolved around our drummer’s body slowly breaking bone by bone. Dude broke his hand in San Francisco (and just kept playing) then he broke his foot 4 days before the big farewell show at Mississippi Studios in Portland and had surgery on his foot (metal plate anyone?) THE DAY BEFORE. He’s an animal.
At any rate, we made some last minute adjustments to the show obviously because he couldn’t play the entire hour long set. One such change was a bit of a throwback to my humble singing DJ beginnings from years back. It was fun to play some of the new stuff and have it just be pop. If my lighting guy had remembered to bring his board to go along with the lights we lugged to the venue it would have been a lot better…or maybe not. It ended up being very intimate, very bare bones, unmasked & vulnerable. It seemed like a very appropriate way to leave things. Here’s a clip from the karaoke portion of last week’s final show:
Next up is a clip from our secret show at this year’s Salem Pride Festival. It ended up being one of the best shows of the entire Summer. Sadly, the camera was right in front of Gino’s guitar amp so the sound of this video is way more fucked up than it usually is but it was such a good day I figured I’d post it anyway.
Hey everybody. As I near the 10 year anniversary of my debut record, “GLEE” (which was originally released in October of 2000) I’ve been thinking a lot about all the years from there to here. I have come to some conclusions not only about the journey I’ve been on since then musically and in my personal life, but also the journey I intend to be on moving forward with both.
One thing that is painfully clear to me and everyone who knows me in real life is that I AM MISERABLE. I have been for some time. I’m sick of being broke, mismanaged, overworked, screwed over by the folks who are supposed to be looking out for me…you know, all the hits. Ever since I overcame my paralyzing stage fright, playing shows has been great and I’ve had a wonderful time on tour this Summer with The Gentry but the abnormalities that come along with being a working musician in the digital era without the proper, traditional support of a label are too much for me to just keep absorbing. I can’t be gone all the time like this. I don’t want to spend my life on the road with strangers in bars and hotel rooms. It’s not healthy. I’m homesick for a home that does not exist because I have been too busy to create it for myself, no other reason. I need something real in my life. I can no longer pretend that things are going to suddenly feel better like magic when I know that they are not. These things I’m putting all my energy into obtaining are not making me happy. They are not ever going to because fame and money and attention is not what I want anymore. It’s time that I take control of my own happiness, something I have been dreading and avoiding for years now because of the terrible consequences and pressures attached to doing so. I am finally brave enough and there is just no stopping me. My humanity is in need of repair. These are someone else’s dreams I’m killing myself to fulfill. It is time for me to chase the light to happiness, not acceptance by the masses.
I am going to take some time completely off far away from the business of being myself professionally, then we’ll see where life has led me. These final shows next month with The Gentry in Salem, on August 6th & in Portland on the 20th are going to be the last shows I play for at least a year or two so I hope you can make it. They are going to be very special nights. Please, PLEASE come to the final show at Mississippi Studios on Friday, August 20th and wish me farewell on my new journey.
I don’t know what I am going to be doing from here but I fulfilled my contract with Beat The World (so I know what I’m not going to be doing, which is a very clear start…or finish, as it were). I am Free, an unsigned independent artist once again, not bound to any contracts, people or associations. I find myself in a moment where I can do one of two things; and I gotta choose the peaceful road, you guys. Think I’m gonna go help people for awhile, do something that actually matters—that isn’t so self-serving and based in phony, superficial publicity opportunities. I am leaving the door open for me to change my mind later on so I’m not saying I’m done forever by any means but it honestly does feel that way at the moment. I just finished that new record with Bryan Cecil and have been leaking the demos all week, freeing myself of the rules and regulations that come with being a brand instead of just some stoner dude who makes funny sounding synthpop songs about death and darkness on his keyboard. If another label comes along and picks me up to release it I’d Read the rest of this entry »
