I was chatting with an older woman who works in my building today for the first time and she said “I hope this comes out the right way but I overheard you say that you needed someone else to set up the bar for the party because you are a recovering alcoholic and I just wanted you to know how happy I was to hear you taking care of yourself like that. You see, my daughter had the same problem but she was never able to get well. I lost her last February. I know how very hard it is and I think it is so great what you are doing.” I smiled and said, “I am so sorry to hear about your daughter. It’s a very difficult journey to be on. So hard on everyone involved.” She replied “Yes…but it was hardest on her.”

We talked for a little while about how now she is raising her granddaughter as her own and how maybe we are all just doing our best, even when we are at our worst (a concept which has come up in conversation lately with a few different people and that I find incredibly hard to wrap my head around at times). At one point her eyes welled up and she said “Hearing you stand up for yourself and your life in that moment made me love my daughter in a way I have not been able to since she died. Thank you for giving that back to me.” She started crying big tears, which made me start crying big tears…then we hugged the hug that only people who have been through the same war hug, an embrace I have felt before with my own hurt, scared mother around this stuff.

In that moment I imagined myself to be her daughter, years later, happy and well, hugging away the pain of watching someone you love struggle through the horrors of addiction. I felt like saying “It’s OK, mom. It’s over now.” as I have done with my mother on several occasions since finally getting well in 2007…but those words mean something so different for her than they do for my mom. For this sweet woman and her daughter, it really is over. All of it. No more memories, no more birthdays or holidays spent together. She is just gone, taken from this world by a glass of something.

I am so thankful that my mother does not have to cry on the shoulder of some other survivor to feel close to her dead child and I am grateful to have real love in my life where there used to be an empty space I filled with cocaine and vodka. I know how lucky that makes me and not a day goes by that I don’t wonder why I get to be one of the lucky ones. These days are cosmic gifts, extra moments bestowed upon me and my family by some unexpected twist of fate. I am 4 years into the bonus round and I try to make every minute count. I get to be here to kiss my boyfriend, play with my dog, watch my nieces grow up, help the community I care so deeply about, and enjoy all these beautiful years I almost didn’t get to have with you all.

Be well, friends. Live the life you are meant to live. Hug your mothers. Find something lovable about yourself and LOVE IT fearlessly. Then, share that love with the world…because the world needs you. If you are struggling with addiction, please tell someone. There are lots of different ways to get lots of different kinds of help and there has never been a better time to get your shit together than RIGHT NOW.

I wish you the happiest of all holidays, everybody.

xo
Logan

Last week I sat down with the editor of Portland Newsweekly Just Out (Amanda Schurr) to chat about my announced departure from my current life in Musicworld. A man has his reasons. If you care to know more, pick up a copy or keep reading below. To read the online version CLICK HERE or to download the PDF version of the 2 page ordeal, click the following two links: Page 34 – Page 35

I love how Just Out never twists my words or calls me fat and ugly. BEST. GAY. PAPER. EVER.

From Just Out: (8/6/2010)

“Will Work for Good : Portland pop dynamo Logan Lynn quits music, for now…

“I’m sure there’s at least a thousand bands in this town that I know that would be like, ‘Dude, you’re super blowing it. I have no idea what you’re talking about,’” concedes Lynn, fresh off a Read the rest of this entry »

Q Town Magazine interviewed me for this month’s issue (on stands now in Virginia, online HERE. Check out the full transcript below! I talk about the usual things people talk about in interviews: cocaine, butt sex, being a jerk, fucking my life up, Jesus, etc.

🙂

From Q TOWN Magazine (August 2010 Issue):

It’s been quite a trip for Portland electronica artist Logan Lynn. From his first studio album, This Is Folk Techno in 1998 to his latest From Pillar To Post, Lynn transports us away to his buzzing trance-like world. Famous for edgy lyrics and playful beats, Lynn creates excitement on MTV, Logo, VH1, Spike and in the pulsating indie music scene.

Q town recently caught up with Logan to chat about hooking up with The Dandy Warhols, his connection to his fans, and how queer culture influences the mainstream.

QT: Your style has been called electro-house mixed with folk, which is a really interesting combination. How did these two come together for you?

LL: I was always really interested in both genres separately growing up and coming into my own musically as a songwriter. At some point in the late 90’s I started blending the two together. Back then nobody really understood what I was doing. I would have shows and people would just stand there and scratch their heads. I could tell they were like “What the hell is this guy doing?”, but that was mostly because they just had no reference point. That was WAY before The Postal Service or some of those groups that came along in the mid 2000’s. Once that all started getting big is when people really started to gravitate to my music. I repackaged and re-released the same record in 2005 that I had released in 2000 and the reaction was amazing so I immediately recorded all the songs I had been writing during that 5 year hiatus from making records and got the ball rolling for my self-titled record in 2006. I’m glad people get it now.

QT: How did you hook up with the indie-rock band The Dandy Warhols and what has that experience been like for you?

LL: I was working on an ad campaign for a company in Los Angeles in 2005 & we hired a photographer from Portland named Ray Gordon who I ended up partying with for days in LA. He fell in love with some of the new material I played him and just happened to be really good friends with Courtney Taylor-Taylor (the Dandys’ frontman). He knew they were starting a label, Courtney and I met, he got really into my record, they signed me in 2007 and released my last record “From Pillar To Post” on their Beat The World label in 2009. It has been really great to have access to their studio and to be able to learn from them. It has been quite the journey from there to here.

QT: Can you tell us the inspiration to the lyrics behind your sharply-titled single, “Bottom your way to the top”?

LL: Well, I was in a very long-term relationship that started ending in 2007, but eluded finality until a little over a year ago. At one point, as our 6 years together were dissolving, the words “Just go and bottom your way to the top, then” was yelled my way….so I wrote a song about it. That whole record (“From Pillar To Post”) is about that time in my life. I was immersed in cocaine partyworld and was losing my love. I didn’t react very well to the breakup initially. I acted out in ways that were, well…song-worthy.

QT: We really love the video for “Bottom your way to the top”. In addition to being a musician you’re also a visual artist. Did you help contribute to the concept behind the video?

LL: Nice one! Thanks. I am always involved in some aspect of everything, but I think much of my success has been found in letting the people I work with do their jobs (be it on songs or videos). I have yet to drink my own Kool-Aid to the point where I think I know how to do everything better than everyone else. That’s bullshit. Anyway, the director Jeffrey McHale (from Chicago) had a very clear vision. I came to him because I felt like he and I had a similar point of view. It turned out that we did. He introduced me to an illustrator named John Parot who came on board to illustrate the video which Jeff then animated. Interestingly enough, John Parot is a contestant on Bravo’s “Work Of Art: The Search For The Next Great Artist” this season. He does amazing work. I love that we got him on that video. His drawings are really what next-leveled that one.

QT: What would you say is the best part of being a performer?

LL: I love the connections I make with people. I think because my songs are so personal they tend to find people that are similar to me. That’s been the case thusfar at least. That connection, that shrinking of the world to a size I can deal with, has been the best part of all of this so far. I like feeling like my crazy is understandable my hundreds of thousands of people. Like…other people aren’t running away from my ugly parts on display so maybe I’m not such a fucking psycho after all?

QT: You’ve been a fixture on MTV, VH1, Spike TV and Logo Online and you’ve got a huge following. How did it feel to break into the biz?

LL: It felt different than I thought it was going to. It is amazing that I get to live out my lifelong dreams and have been able to get to the point I’m at currently with this whole thing…but I’ll be honest and say that I always had it in my mind that I would get here and suddenly be happy, suddenly feel like I belong. Unfortunately, that is not the case so I’ve had to mourn the loss of that delusional notion as it has become clear that there just simply is no golden ticket. I love singing, I love writing, I love that there are so many people who feel a connection with me and my songs…but it’s isolating, too. That’s sort-of the nature of the beast I guess…but I wasn’t prepared for that part. It gets lonely on the island, ya know?

Read the rest of this entry »

I was interviewed for the premier issue of Dirty Magazine (available in July) and our chat is currently one of the feature stories on their website! You can check it out HERE or just keep reading below.

From Dirty Magazine: (July 2010)

“LOGAN LYNN’S LAST HIGH: LOGAN LYNN – MUSICIAN, PORTLAND RESIDENT, SELF DESCRIBED “EMO-PROPHET” – TALKS ABOUT HIS STRICT CHRISTIAN UPBRINGING, COCAIN ADDICTION, AND THE JOYS OF JOY BEHAR.

LL: I was pretty young when I started making up my own lyrics and melodies. Basically, as soon as I could speak I started to sing. There are cassette tapes of me singing original material dating back to when I was two or three. The first proper song that I wrote, recorded, and performed was when I was 12. I had just gotten heavily into drugs and wrote a song about Windowpane [LSD] that I recorded in my cousin’s studio and then performed at a Christian talent show. Needless to say, I didn’t win.
Read the rest of this entry »