I’m one of like 5 people who somehow managed to have a good year — but I miss restaurants, live music, trying on clothes in stores, and staying home for fun. I miss making eyes with random men at parties and the creepy way my chiropractor always used to tell me I smelled good while he was cracking my back. I miss your faces, I miss movie theaters, and most of all, I miss not being afraid all the time — for you, for me, and for what all of this means for the future.

I responded to this madness by leaning all the way into joy, glamour, music, fashion, fundraising and gayness, everywhere I could. I made keeping myself, my family, and my colleagues safe and moving forward my number one priority in 2020 — and it worked. We did the thing and we are still here.

Love you all. I’ll kiss you at midnight next year.